When his housecat overturned the ink

And marched apace across the immortal pages

Recording Arden Forest’s tuneful woodnotes

And Jaques’ speech on mankind’s seven ages,

The bard decided that he must rethink

(Heigh-ho the wind and the rain!)

And do them again.

Pay no attention to what the Baconian says:

It was the man Shakespeare who wrote the plays,

While his cat, Bardolph, contributed the footnotes.

—Fred Chappell